sunday night

-lots to do
-homecoming
-bday
-sitting here in the living room

at hollister's house

thankful for HEAT in hollister and BB's house!!!! god, thank you that you give us what we need right when we need it. fun walk with maggie and janie! and raquetball...

today...right what i need

monday morning and a FAILED test. not the best start to the week. but, lord, may i remember that you give us right what we need when we need it. thank you for sweet maggie who sent me the encouragement that i needed right at that moment. god, this university is just unbelievable and i am oh so thankful for the way that you place us here...and you give us our daily bread. lord, help me PRESS ON...i'm frustrated, i feel discouraged, but lord i know that i just need to give biomechanics a little more EFFORT!!!
psalm 73:26 MY FLESH AND MY HEART MY FAIL, but GOD IS THE STRENGTH OF MY HEART AND MY PORTION FOREVER.
our efforts fail.

lunch with audrey and rebecca and sallie

i'm at caribou about to work on homework...but i'm having one of those moments...of frustration of wondering of confusion.  i have found myself being so crazy about measuring my time...and i feel like i always get like this before tests.  i turn into this different person who gets so concerned about getting stuff "DONE" and checking things off my list, etc...and i just lose track of the bigger picture.  lord, right now, help me fix my eyes on YOU, author and creator and maker of all that is good.  thank you for my housemates...thank you for the

2:43am after informal

lord, thank you for a safe trip to and from roxboro and for a good time at informal...just drove conny home and got cookies that kamri left on the counter.  lord, please multiply my hours of sleep tonight and thank you for living alongside these awesome awesome girls.

thursday 31 oct 2013 sitting in the union

alright, lord, here i am. i just wanna be hanging out but i'm pressing on with this policy paper. and they just delivered free cupcakes from the union...apple and cream cheese icing.  lord, that is how you are- a gift to all of us and you don't expect anything in return.  lord i can't get over what lee lee said...she deleted everything off her computer.  isn't that funny how life operates...we are 100 percent into something one year and then the next year it doesn't even matter. god, help me press on this year...thank you for time yesterday with mary gordon. thank you for learning how nervous i am to share my faith with people in the pit and for FORGIVING friends...lord, i give you the rest of my day. bless my efforts with this paper and help me know that i don't need to get too wrapped up in it.

late night fun

lord, i just give you macon and our friendship. and thank you that you hear my prayer. thank you for the late night trip to target tonight w janie and baking cookies.  and i pray that you will just be a part of our house moving forward.  help me not COMPARE myself to others- lord, why is that sometimes i feel like i'm always struggling with?? thank you that i can compare myself to NO ONE but you on the cross. and thank you for rachael's encouraging words on her blog! and for her growth and dependence on you. and thank you for sweet nights like this when i feel you. i pray not for claudia and rawlings finishing up their business school assignment. i lift up carlton- and thank you for our sweet time on our walk this afternoon. i pray for ace and for her sharing.  i am heading to bed right now. lord, please help me wake up in the morning!

parents cocktail and reflection of the weekend

it's 830am on monday morning...and i'm sitting in the den. kelley is doing her bible study, kamri is studying for swahili and hannah is reading at the dining room table. and lord, we just come before you and recognize the blessing of this house.  what a special place to call home. and lord, this year is slipping away- day by day- but may we remember that we can trust your timing.  god, thank you for an INCREDIBLE past few days.  thursday was a go-go-go day...finishing my paper for corrado, then going to the muscle cut class for a second then bible study and dinner with jg...god, i just lift her up, and i praise you for how you're working in her life.  and thank you for sweet time with szep...the night of ALMOSTS...hooka, the place next to sandwich, nc state fair...and then we ended up just going on a walk and going down to LINDAS for cheese fries! and we saw kristin! and lord, on friday...i just couldn't get out of bed, but lord as you remind us, it's not what we can DO for you, but what you have already DONE for us.  and i just hustled around friday from class to class and then to meet with olivia and dana and then to lunch for a quick sec with mr. ostrander and then to raleigh for dermatology...and then back to CLEAN the house...and then to the carolina inn to get ready!
lord, thank you for the sweet conversation with my parents about jg and friends in kd who don't know you.  and thank you for their support.
so thankful my parents and i got to talk with the rutherfords, the boehlings, the montigues, the rollins, amanda coates' family, brunch yesterday with the allens on the front porch.
and lord, this week, i pray that i can carry out colossians 3:23- whatever you do, work at it with ALL your heart...as if you are working for the LORD and not for men.
lord, guide my time. help me know how to prioritize. and thank you for who you are and how you are at work.  i pray that i can be bold this weekend with individual friends- and i pray for sal and mary gordan.

quinn's blog post and remembering HIS FAITHFULNESS!!!!

There's lots to be "worried" about. But rather than stay up speculating on the weather or repacking my carryon, I chose to do the same thing I did in 2011.

The answer is to remember God's faithfulness in the past. Both in history and in my own life .

God has been so faithful. I have been blessed to have so many friends remind me this week as I have teetered on the verge of anxiety. God has been so faithful in my own life. This "spiritual memory" is critical to the building of our faith!! We know God works all things for our good and His glory. I greatly anticipate being able to share with you how God was glorified and how we were blessed. Praise Him!

Then I thought, "To this I will appeal; the years when the Most High stretched out his right hand. I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will consider all your works and meditate on all your might deeds." Psalm 77:10-12

Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness. I say to myself "The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." Lamentations 3:22-24

The Psalmist in Psalm 105 not only recounts God's goodness and faithfulness in his own life, but to His people from generations to generations: "He spread out a cloud as a covering and a fire to give light at night. They asked and he brought them quail; he fed them well with the bread of heaven. He opened the rock, and water gushed out; it flowed like a river in the desert. He remembered his holy promise given to his servant Abraham. He brought out his people with rejoicing, his chosen ones with shouts of joy. Psalm 105.

The same God who has brought me safely to Africa, Asia and the Middle East will lead us tomorrow. The same God who brought His people out of Egypt with rejoicing will lead tomorrow. What freedom it gives to know we follow Him, not a program or a plan. And thank you for praying. He is moving in this part of North Eastern India and it is going to be such a blessing to be a part. Our prayer is that our hearts would be awakened and that He would continue to reveal Himself to men, women and children and that Freedom would reign.

lord, here i am sitting with kamri at our dining room table- and i am just so thankful for your faithfulness. god i remember your miracles on a daily basis.  the fact that you led me to africa to have a heart change.  the fact that you provided these friends who mean the WORLD TO ME!! my parents. my sisters. my grandmother.  my personality.  lord, you don't need us but you allow us to help you and be a VESSEL.  a broken, clogged, messed up vessel.  lord, may we fixate our eyes on YOU...not your

sitting in the UL on tuesday morning

yesterday was a day full of adventures...and also feeling a little scrambled.  woke up and couldn't get out of bed...sweet mom heated up my apple cider for me...i always get frustrated when she just lingers in my room when i'm trying to get ready but then i realize what a  blessing she is!! and i am also reminded of how thankful i am for my dad- who made my lunch on saturday morning when i was in a rush to get to the hospital on time.  caroline called me yesterday when i was on my way back to school...and i am so thankful that i got to speak with her.  lord, give me GRACE...i think so often, i am critical of her and her way of doing life.  but lord, help me know how to love her as you would.  and then i went to class...then met with gail corrado after class...then went on a run and suttons with cars. lord, it's the little moments like that- where i am just so thankful.  and then i went to dship with emily cosgrove and crystal...went to target. and then i came back and took a nap and went on a walk with allie higgins.  and then 3rd degree and saw mrs jones. and then group meeting with barkley and elizabeth and nathan and macon and remington. aka JOKES in the alpha chi kitchen...goldfish at middle school dances/fruit punch and elizabeth's hug!! and then baked cookies in our kitchen!! funfetti and janie came over! and woke up this morning and wrote notes to people and pictures!! lord, i pray for macon now- i hope i wasn't too strong last night encouraging her to go abroad for a year but i honestly think it would be the BEST thing for her!! help me learn to abide- speak as you would speak!! and i lift up the people heading to india today. 1 peter 5:10...that YOU will RESTORE us, ESTABLISH us, STRENGTHEN us, and SUPPORT us!!! thank you lord!

last night at home for fall break

here i am lying in my own bed...just so thankful for the time of prayer we just had with ace through skype.  and mom, dad, sal, and i just prayed with ace about what is coming up this week. lord, help her know that she doesn't need to feel validated.  lord, you are enough. and her heart behind that is enough. god, thank you for doing MORE THAN WE CAN EVER ask or imagine. eph 3:20. what a gift fall break has been...chillin in the den with helen/kelley/hannah/macon/kk, going on a run by myself through campus, dillo and aaron carter, thurs: sleeping in, lunch with quinn, tailgating and game with fun friends, biskis, going out after to dke,...fri: derm appt, chilling at home with mom and sal and dad...long run and talking with katy and claire, taking mom and dad to the fair...kk's bday dinner...working all day Saturday and sweet dad who made my lunch saturday morning...Jade Palace with Ellen...hanging with marian and taylor and isabelle...late night chats in their den about alex...sleeping in rawlings' bed and then waking up this morning and going to whole foods...then sweet lunch with the waggoners and walking with audge...and then tonight just sitting in the den with dad as he worked on bible study and i read/wrote notes. lord, for the lady at kinkos who was so helpful and had so much patience...and for the apple cider at HT...Lord, these little blessings...help me not look past them but rather rejoice in them. and notice the MAKER...YOU...the CREATOR...the GIVER OF ALL LIFE! lord, THANK YOU!!!!

1:33am thursday night 17 Oct. 2013

slept til 11 and then lunch with quinn! talked about how we don't need to be a pendilum and how we can ask for god's grace through what we struggle with.  rather than taking huge extremes, ask him to change our heart.
came back to chapel hill...then got ready quickly...beta, dke, phi delt, game, then back to bskis for cookies and then dke.
FUN TIME HAD BY ALL!!!!!

aaron carter

it's 2am on thursday morning (wednesday night)...and we just got back from seeing aaron carter!!!!! it was hilarious!! pics after then wendys! bed now!

first afternoon of fall break

just went on a run by myself...and i am so thankful for that time.  it was a marathon weekend:  worked in the hospital on friday and then stranger mixer friday night...then GL retreat through sunday and then janie's birthday party.  test tuesday and today..and i've been operating on little sleep.  and today has turned out differently than planned.  after class i skyped ace which was SUCH a blessing! lord, thank you for helping me fix my eyes on you...and not the numbers and monetary way i tend to view success.  i had plans to hang out with carlton and isabelle...but i ended up going on a run by myself.  i needed that. down at the hospital, i had this realization that i need to have a clearer picture of the people i'm pouring into...not just surfacey with a lot of people but actual intentional friendships!
lord, right now, i'm struggling with putting all my identity in specific friendships, but help me just surrender that. lord, help me give up those lies!!
help me rest in you...and that my value isn't in people...or their views of me...